Getting good at conversations and overcoming social barriers can havea profound impact beyond your current self-esteem.

What if you were interested in getting good at relating to the opposite sex? Not just striking up a conversation, but also maintaining a healthy,happy relationship....

We all know it's not easy. I say if it's worth it, it doesn't matter how hard, I'm still going to master this....

Understand that they are just as nervous, if not more. Sometimes,people even get flattered to know others find them attractive and nowmust "live up to the standard" because subconsciously we don't wantthat high feeling to leave. Even the most gorgeous models are insecure.

Read a book called the "Inner Game of Tennis" ... it talks aboutthe question: If I did this, will it kill me or can I live another day? This is the same as risking embarrassment when talking to the opposite gender ... will you live another day if they reject you?

Seek commonality. Express yourself and ask them questions if theylike X or enjoy Y as well. If there is little commonality, there isan uphill battle, thus the first thing I recommend is seeking commonality. This is fuel for a conversation!

Do you find youself at a loss for words?

I've had a question from a reader lately on something everyone faces.

"I get tongue-tied a lot .... what do I do?"

Yep, what do we do when we can't figure out what to say?

The first thing to realize is that people are just as self-conscious as you! They are also figuring out what to say. Even if this person isnot attracted to you, social courtesy dictates for them to continueunless they end it explicitly.

I always prepare for this using my news sources ... but I have yet another method ... simply change locations! For example, let's sayyou are sitting down with your date at a coffee shop and you run out of things to say. Just say "Hey let's go walk around the shops".

This will get you a refreshed mind on what to say. On a subconsciouslevel, your mind adapts to new environments and tries to pick outthings right away unlike an old environment even if that was a fewminutes old!

I hope this has helped you.